So there I was...

[MovieManiac]

My firend Shawn and me make these stories all the time. Have whatever stupid nonsence and plot twists you like. Just be stupid. Or be politically correct, and the rest of us will add the stupidity for you. (Please do this in first person)
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So there I was, goin' 90 in a 45 zone.

[JAGuar]

And I looked out the window and saw a light flashing red and blue. At first I thought it was the cops, then realized it was an ambulance and pulled to the side of the road.

[MovieManiac]

It was goin fast. It sped right by me. Thats when I heard the sirens. I look in my rear view mirror and saw the cops coming. They passed me. I wasn't doin anything important at the time, so I followed the police car. As I got up the road I saw that the cop had pulled oer the ambulence and was writing a ticket. Some people just don't know how to behave. As I drove away from this crime, I saw that I was being followed by Mother Superior, and her band of rowdy vicious nuns!

[JAGuar]

"Come back here, you sinner!" She yelled at me through the rearview mirror. "You haven't made a confession in 13 years."

She was right and wrong at the same time. Whereas I wasn't even Catholic, I was only 13 years old, so I punched the gas pedal.

I don't know if it was the beer I had with my altoids or just the way the sun was out, but she grew three times as big, turning red and purple, ordering her nun friends to go faster.

Needless to say, I was scared.

[MovieManiac]

Then I realized that I could escape. I took my bible out of theback seat and threw it beside me in the road. The nun's car stopped and three of them got out to save the bible.

"We'll be back!" screamed Mother Superior. Then I was too far away to see them. I laughed and ate an altoid. They were green flavored, and they tasted nasty. But damn, were those things addictive.

I drove by a cow farm. I was on the run from the church, so I could stop to pet one. I drove all day and stop in a mountainous town that night. I was regestered at the Overlook Hotel.

[JAGuar]

And to my surprise, later that night, the nuns drove by, overlooking the hotel. Go figure.

[Maddik]

I slept soundessly and without sound that night. When I woke up in the morning, I realized that I was not in Kansas anymore. Than I realized that I wasn't in Kansas in the first place.

[KWG 14]

So I got back into my car and took off.

[MovieManiac]

Before I left, I saw some naked lady running across the hall yelling REDRUM! I decided to go into her room and take all her drugs. I was stoned for hours while I kept riding down the road that morning.

[JAGuar]

Then I saw Lenny Kravits get eaten by hundreds of ravens.

[MovieManiac]

I laughed a lot. But then I crashed into a tree. I would have been pissed if I hadn't been under such heavy sedation.

[JAGuar]

So there I was, staring down a long tunnel with a light at the end. I thought I was going to heaven. Then I realized I was just in a train tunnel.

[MovieManiac]

It was a small train though. Actually it was an airplane. Actually, I don't know what it was because I was stoned. But I passed out. I peed too.

[JAGuar]

And then I proceeded to watch an interview with Jason Ritter, John Ritter's son. Strangely enough, he looks a lot like JIm Carrey.

[MovieManiac]

What does that have to do with anything? I don't know. It does not make SENSE! So I decided that it was time for me to...